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20 Responses to Telemarketers 2/21/2004 1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money. <br> 2. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad y 0 Comments, 30 Views, 0 Votes | |
Signs That You Are Too Drunk 2/21/2004 You lose arguments with inanimate objects. <br> You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth. <br> Job interfering with your drinking. <br> Yo 0 Comments, 21 Views, 0 Votes | |
Performance 2/21/2004 Three women were sitting around talking about their husbands' performance as a lover. <br> The first woman says "My Husband works as a marriage counselor. He always buys me flowers an 0 Comments, 30 Views, 0 Votes | |
Redneck Lottery 2/21/2004 A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Austin to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Redneck says, "I want my $20 million." <br> The man replied, " 0 Comments, 28 Views, 0 Votes | |
Drivers 2/21/2004 One hand on the wheel, one hand on the horn: New York City <br> One hand on wheel, one finger out window: Chicago <br> One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on 0 Comments, 19 Views, 0 Votes | |
Making a baby 2/21/2004 Mom and Dad were taking young Billy for a walk through the park one sunny afternoon when all of a sudden, in the bushes a short distance away, Billy spots two dogs going at it. Billy says, "D 0 Comments, 48 Views, 0 Votes | |
Picture Day 2/21/2004 Two old ladies decided to have their portraits taken. One was nearly deaf. As they entered the studio, the photographer asked them to take a seat. <br> The deaf one asked "What did 0 Comments, 17 Views, 0 Votes | |
Bill Gates in heaven 2/21/2004 When Bill Gates died, he went up to Heaven, where Saint Peter showed him to his house; a beautiful 20 room house, with grounds and a tennis court. Bill Gates was pleased, and spent many months 0 Comments, 22 Views, 0 Votes | |
Dead or Alive 2/21/2004 Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? A: No. Q: Did you check for blood pressure? A: No. Q: Did you check for breathing? A: No. Q: So, then 0 Comments, 23 Views, 0 Votes | |
Slow Down! 2/21/2004 Bob is out driving his new sports car. He's having a ball on the interstate, zipping in and out of traffic. He exits the highway...slows down at the stop sign, but does not stop...and just goes on 0 Comments, 14 Views, 0 Votes | |
How to get a man's attention 2/21/2004 This has got to be one of the best singles ads ever printed. It appeared in the Atlanta Journal. Companion Wanted: SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I am a very good l 0 Comments, 61 Views, 0 Votes |
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