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oh ms Jamaica 6/28/2019 A ’s most important Organ supposedly as described by some of the most beautiful women of the world at the Miss Universe Contest. <br><br> INDIA <br><br> Question: Ms India, h 0 Comments, 42 Views, 0 Votes | |
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you're BI 10/4/2018 all men and women are BI.... its up to you to guess if its POLAR or SEXUAL!!!!! 0 Comments, 6 Views, 0 Votes | |
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ha ha!!! 7/25/2018 A lady comes home from her doctor's appointment grinning from ear to ear. Her husband asks, "Why are you so happy?" The wife says, "The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old 0 Comments, 40 Views, 0 Votes | |
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bull!!! 7/24/2018 A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can fin 0 Comments, 55 Views, 0 Votes | |
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codes!!! 7/23/2018 A boy says to a girl, "So, sex at my place?" "Yeah!" "Okay, but I sleep in a bunk bed with my younger brother, and he thinks we're making sandwiches, so we have to have a 0 Comments, 32 Views, 0 Votes | |
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math 7/21/2018 A football coach walked into the locker room before a game, looked over to his star player and said, "I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we need you in there. So what 0 Comments, 59 Views, 0 Votes | |
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yachting!!! 7/18/2018 A man joins a soccer team and his new teammates inform him, "At your first team dinner as the new guy, you will have to give us a talk about sex." The evening arrives and he gives a detailed 0 Comments, 52 Views, 0 Votes | |
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skiers!! 7/17/2018 Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of 0 Comments, 28 Views, 0 Votes | |
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parents!!! 7/17/2018 A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, and fall in love and 0 Comments, 44 Views, 0 Votes | |
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lol 7/13/2018 A piece of string walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks at him and says, "We don't serve string here." So the string goes outside, twists himself up a bit, kind of rou 0 Comments, 37 Views, 0 Votes | |
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riddle 7/13/2018 Why can you never hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? <br><br> <br><br> <br><br> <br><br> Because the pee is silent. 0 Comments, 10 Views, 0 Votes | |
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hand some 4/25/2018 When three people have sex, it's called a threesome. When two people have sex, it's called a twosome. Now I understand why they call you handsome.  0 Comments, 40 Views, 0 Votes | |
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huge penis!! 4/22/2018 The man with a 25 inch penis. A man who had a 25 inch long penis went to his doctor to complain that he was having a problem with this rather massive instrument and has had more than one complaint. &q 0 Comments, 100 Views, 0 Votes | |
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pokers 4/20/2018 Q: Why are pubic hairs curly? <br><br> A: So you don't poke your eye out.  0 Comments, 20 Views, 0 Votes | |
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pokers 4/20/2018 Q: Why are pubic hairs curly? <br><br> A: So you don't poke your eye out. 0 Comments, 9 Views, 0 Votes | |
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pokers 4/20/2018 Q: Why are pubic hairs curly? <br><br> A: So you don't poke your eye out. 0 Comments, 4 Views, 0 Votes | |
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boobies 4/20/2018 Q. What did saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? <br><br> <br><br> A. "If we don't get some support here people are going to think were nuts." <br><br 0 Comments, 20 Views, 0 Votes | |
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sales 4/14/2018 A woman goes into a adult toy shop to buy a dildo. She sees one behind the counter and tells the salesman, "I want that one!" <br><br> He replies, "It's not for sale.&qu 0 Comments, 56 Views, 0 Votes | |
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smart 4/13/2018 Teacher, "Tell me the difference between a Callgirl, Girlfriend and Wife?" <br><br> The whole class was silent.. till little Johnny put his hand up and answered: <br><br 0 Comments, 39 Views, 0 Votes | |
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rubber penis 4/13/2018 at the airport, Customs officer finds a rubber penis in a lady's handbag and asks, " Are you married?" lady: Yes <br><br> Officer: "Then why this?" <br><br 0 Comments, 29 Views, 0 Votes | |
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salesman 4/12/2018 The salesman is using sex to sell me a CD er, giving me pressure about my love life. 'Mr. Mercurio, it's a CD er carousel model. You load all of your CDs into this baby -- you're with yo 0 Comments, 37 Views, 0 Votes | |
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sale 4/12/2018 Q: Did you hear about the Bill Clinton sale at clothing stores on President's Day? <br><br> A: All pants half off. 0 Comments, 12 Views, 0 Votes | |
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good ole days!! 4/12/2018 An old retired sailor puts on his old uniform and goes down to the docks once more for old time's sake. He hires a and takes her up to the room. He's going at it as best as he can for a guy h 0 Comments, 47 Views, 0 Votes | |
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sanity 4/11/2018 A mad man saw his fellow mad friend crying by a river side. He sat down beside him and asked: “Why are u crying?" The other replied: “I put a cube of in this river, but w 0 Comments, 26 Views, 0 Votes | |
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breast 3/18/2018 how much calcium is there in woman's breasts? <br><br> answer: its enough to help a man's boneless thing stand up!!!  0 Comments, 13 Views, 0 Votes | |
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condoms 3/15/2018 Q. Why are condoms transparent? <br><br> A: So that sperms can at least enjoy the ene even if their entry is Restricted! 0 Comments, 22 Views, 0 Votes | |
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banana vs vibrator!! 11/8/2017 Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator? A: "What are you shaking about, it's me she's going to eat. 0 Comments, 17 Views, 0 Votes | |
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penis!! 11/8/2017 At a government affair, the wives of four world leaders are chatting about how people refer to a penis in their countries. The wife of Tony Blair says in England people call it a gentleman, because it 0 Comments, 67 Views, 0 Votes | |
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black testicles!! 11/8/2017 A Male patient just recovered successfully from a sex threatening health attack. He was wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose and laying on hospital bed. An young nurse came to cleanse his bo 0 Comments, 66 Views, 0 Votes | |
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memory test? 11/8/2017 how good is your memory? <br><br> <br><br> i remember going to the party with my dad and went home with my mom!!! <br><br>
explanation: daddy went to a party , h0 Comments, 29 Views, 0 Votes | |
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weddings!! 9/6/2017 why do brides wear white at a wedding? <br><br> <br><br> <br><br> nah, ,, ,, thats not it!!!! <br><br> hmmmm, try again!!! <br><br> because 0 Comments, 24 Views, 0 Votes | |
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work out regime!! 4/8/2017 My doctor took one look at my gut and refused to believe that i work out. So I listed the exercises i do every day: jump to conclusions, climb the walls, drag my heels, push my luck, make mountains ou 0 Comments, 40 Views, 0 Votes | |
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penis like a chimney!!! 1/24/2017 A redneck went to the hospital, as his wife was having a baby. Upon arriving, he sat down as the nurse said to him. “Congratulations, your wife has had quintruples, five big baby boys." The redneck 0 Comments, 74 Views, 0 Votes | |
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smart !! 10/21/2016 mother: "... who is the 40th president of America?" : " I dont know mom." Mother: " its Sir Ronald Regan ....(after consfiscating the new game console)you have to put away the games 0 Comments, 163 Views, 0 Votes | |
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inches!! 9/18/2016 you know the look!, yea..." the look", I am referring to the look ok your face whilst having sex with someone for the first time and you hear the moan and groans , yes baby! yes!! baby...fuck me hard 0 Comments, 66 Views, 0 Votes | |
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words!!! 9/1/2016 a husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use per day....30000 to a man's 15000. The wife replied. "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men". < 0 Comments, 42 Views, 0 Votes | |
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trump!! 8/21/2016 Me: There are 3 Mexican roosters on one side of the street how many legs do they have? Trump: 6 Me: how many wings? Trump: 6 Me: how many eyes? Trump: 6 Me: Ok, There are 3 white cats on the oth 0 Comments, 104 Views, 0 Votes | |
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gotcha!!! 8/5/2016 Which came first, the chicken or the egg? < 0 Comments, 30 Views, 0 Votes | |
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survey says!!! 7/30/2016 The United States funded a study to determine why the head on a mans' penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two years and cost over $1.2 million. The study concluded that the reason the head 0 Comments, 67 Views, 0 Votes | |
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wise! 7/30/2016 A father is asked by his friend, "Has your decided what he wants to be when he grows up?" "Yes, he wants to be a garbage collector, " replied the boy's father. His friend thought for a moment and r 0 Comments, 54 Views, 0 Votes | |
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luv it!!! 7/20/2016 A father told his 3 when he sent them to college: "I feel it's my duty to provide you with the best possible education, and you do not owe me anything for that. However, I want you to appreciate it 0 Comments, 129 Views, 0 Votes | |
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right size!!! 7/15/2016 Does size matter to women? FRIENDS !!! Women's response to: 2 inches - I can't even hold it. 3 inches - Never been so unsatisfied. 4 inches- I've had bigger tha 0 Comments, 95 Views, 0 Votes | |
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beep beep!! 7/8/2016 One day a father and his five year old went to the bank to cash a check. There was a few people in front of them waiting for the bank teller. The lady in front of them was a rather large well dressed 0 Comments, 111 Views, 0 Votes | |
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horny cock!! 7/2/2016 reply to this post rate flag Rodney the Rooster A farmer has a bunch of hens that are not producing many eggs. So one morning he goes out and buys a young horny rooster and 0 Comments, 108 Views, 0 Votes | |
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dollars and sense!!! 6/30/2016 The Sierra Club and the U.S. Forest Service were presenting an alternative to the Wyoming ranchers for controlling the coyote population. It seems that after years of the ranchers using the tried and 0 Comments, 58 Views, 0 Votes | |
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oldie but goldie! 6/27/2016 Blonde Joke of the Day Back in the '80's, a blonde lady decides to do something wild she hasn't done before, so she sets out to rent her first X-rated adult video. She goes to the vi 0 Comments, 85 Views, 0 Votes | |
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scam!!!! 6/22/2016 WARNING: TO ALL THE MEN: READ THE FOLLOWING Women often receive warnings about protecting themselves at the mall and in dark parking lots, etc. This is the first warning I 0 Comments, 75 Views, 0 Votes | |
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whats wrong hun? 6/21/2016 A man came home from work sporting two black eyes. "What happened to you?" asked his wife. "I'll never understand women, " he replied. "I was riding up in an escalator behind this pretty young girl, a 0 Comments, 67 Views, 0 Votes | |
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smart woman!! 6/11/2016 A businessman and his secretary, overcome by passion, go to his house for an early afternoon quickie. "Don't worry, " he assures her, "my wife is out of town on a business trip, so there's no risk." 0 Comments, 102 Views, 0 Votes | |
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the difference! 6/2/2016 Mechanic vs Surgeon A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley, when he spotted a world-famous heart surgeon in his shop. The heart surgeon was waiting for the service 0 Comments, 99 Views, 0 Votes | |
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poor bubba!!! 5/20/2016 Bubba walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him what he had. Bubba said, "Shingles." So she wrote down his name, address, medical insurance number and told him t 0 Comments, 95 Views, 0 Votes | |
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which hole? 5/9/2016 A man went to a strange town to be the guest speaker at a business meeting. When he arrived at his Motel, he found he had a lot of time before the meeting so he got the directions for a nearby golf co 0 Comments, 117 Views, 0 Votes | |
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labels!!! 5/7/2016 In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's 0 Comments, 61 Views, 0 Votes | |
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perseverance!!!! 4/28/2016 Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly c 0 Comments, 92 Views, 0 Votes | |
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bottles up!!! 4/17/2016 Colorado Springs: A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of scotch that 0 Comments, 115 Views, 0 Votes | |
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bottles up!!! 4/17/2016 Colorado Springs: A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of scotch that 0 Comments, 29 Views, 0 Votes | |
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reality!!! 4/12/2016 I was out shopping and my total was $36.50. So I gave the girl at the register two twenties, six dollars and fifty cents so I would get a $10. The little girl looked at the money then looked at me the 0 Comments, 91 Views, 0 Votes | |
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men .....luv them!!! 4/4/2016 Men Are Like Placemats. They only show up when there's food on the table. ..Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion. ..Bike helmets. They're goo 0 Comments, 47 Views, 0 Votes | |
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all in the drink! 3/22/2016 Bartenders were asked if they could nail a woman's personality based on what she drinks. Though interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts. The results: Drink: Bee 0 Comments, 103 Views, 0 Votes | |
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oh come on 3/17/2016 Wife: Oh, come on. Husband: Leave me alone! Wife: It won't take long. Husband: I won't be able to sleep afterwards. Wife: Yeah, well I can't sleep without it. Husband: Why do you always do this in 0 Comments, 105 Views, 0 Votes | |
Problem Solving 101 3/13/2016 Husband: Honey, I have problems at work. Wife: Not "I", but "we" have problems
- since we are married, your problems are mine problems
as well. Husband: Ok, then I wanted to let you know that ou0 Comments, 40 Views, 0 Votes | |
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racing fans!! 3/9/2016 reply to this post rate flag Horses in the race are: 1. Passionate Lady 2. Bare Belly 3. Silk Panties 4. Conscience 5. Jockey Shorts 6. Clean Sheets 7. Thighs 8. Big Johnson 0 Comments, 38 Views, 0 Votes | |
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is that all? 3/8/2016 A young couple were married and celebrated their first night together, doing what newlyweds do, time and time again, all night long. Morning comes and the groom goes into the bathroom but finds no 0 Comments, 94 Views, 0 Votes | |
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pov from my partner in crime 3/7/2016 When she said she eats pussy better than anybody we laughed . But she really could dance good and with her 5'11 frame with her big butt we really didn't have much of a choice . Back in the hotel I got 0 Comments, 495 Views, 0 Votes | |
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smart guy!!! 3/5/2016 Three guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia. One day, they stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came 0 Comments, 76 Views, 0 Votes | |
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attention please!!!! 2/29/2016 Official Announcement: The government today announced that it is changing its emblem from an Eagle to a CONDOM because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance. A condom 0 Comments, 46 Views, 0 Votes | |
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all in the NAME!!! 2/13/2016 the first of the Three Wise Men slowly approached the barn and gingerly crossed over the threshold----into a big juicy pile of shit. Looking down at his gold slippers, he let out a shriek----"Jesus C 0 Comments, 43 Views, 0 Votes | |
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rescue!!! 2/9/2016 reply to this post rate flag One day a man, who had been stranded on a desert island for over ten years sees an unusual speck on the horizon. "It's certainly not a ship", he thinks to himsel 0 Comments, 149 Views, 0 Votes | |
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vacation!!!! 2/3/2016 God decided he needed a vacation One of his aides suggested Venus. "Forget it, " God said, "I went there 10, 000 years ago and got sunburned." Another aide suggested Jupiter. "No way, " God 0 Comments, 83 Views, 0 Votes | |
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marriage!!! 2/3/2016 Dingey's father was disturbed when he found out his was masturbating several times a day out in the barn. "Boy, you gotta quit that! Go out and get yourself a wife." So Dingey wen 0 Comments, 151 Views, 0 Votes | |
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the challenge 2/2/2016 One evening, two guys were in a bar arguing over which of them can have sex the most times in one night. They decide to settle the issue by going to the local whorehouse and gathering experimental evi 0 Comments, 118 Views, 0 Votes | |
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a+ 2/1/2016 Dan, a college student, is home for summer break. In order to make a few extra bucks he decides that he is going to apply for a part time job at the local K-Mart. Dan fills out the standard applicatio 0 Comments, 104 Views, 0 Votes | |
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the vagina!!! 1/31/2016 The best engine in the world is the Vagina. It can be started with one finger, It is self lubricating, It takes any size piston, And it changes it's own oil every four weeks. It is only a pity that th 0 Comments, 120 Views, 0 Votes | |
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the vagina!!! 1/31/2016 The best engine in the world is the Vagina. It can be started with one finger, It is self lubricating, It takes any size piston, And it changes it's own oil every four weeks. It is only a pity that th 0 Comments, 46 Views, 0 Votes | |
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the vagina!!! 1/31/2016 The best engine in the world is the Vagina. It can be started with one finger, It is self lubricating, It takes any size piston, And it changes it's own oil every four weeks. It is only a pity that th 0 Comments, 47 Views, 0 Votes | |
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wise soul!!! 1/30/2016 A senior citizen was walking across a damp meadow when he heard a female voice say, "Sir, I would like to ask a great favor of you "He looked around and saw only a frog sitting on a grass pod. "I must 0 Comments, 96 Views, 0 Votes | |
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surprize!! 1/30/2016 At a girl's college dormitory, dates were permitted only on Saturday night. One young man showed up on a Tuesday evening, explaining to an older woman in the lobby of the dorm that it was im 0 Comments, 110 Views, 0 Votes | |
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oh billy!!! 1/28/2016 Little Billy was at home doing his math homework. He said to himself, “Two plus five, that of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that of a bitch is nine.” In that moment, his mother comes in and 0 Comments, 105 Views, 0 Votes | |
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awesome ride 1/28/2016 I bought a new Dodge Challenger. I returned to the dealer the next day complaining that I couldn't figure out how the radio worked. The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated. 0 Comments, 85 Views, 0 Votes | |
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all night long!!! 1/27/2016 Two dwarfs pick up two hookers and take them to their hotel rooms. The first dwarf not only can't get a hard-on, but all night he has to listen to the other dwarf and the other grunting "On 0 Comments, 78 Views, 0 Votes | |
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calling to say thank you!! 1/25/2016 A Jewish congregation in New York honors its Rabbi for 25 years of service by sending him to Hawaii for a week, all expenses paid. When he walks into his hotel room, there's a beautiful girl 0 Comments, 92 Views, 0 Votes | |
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man down call 911!!! 12/19/2015 Wife: "How would you describe me?" Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." Wife: "What does that mean?" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." Wife: "Aw, thank 0 Comments, 46 Views, 0 Votes | |
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easy A!!!! 12/19/2015 After having failed his exam, a student goes and confronts his lecturer about it. Student: “Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?” Professor: “Surely I must. Otherwise I wo 0 Comments, 137 Views, 0 Votes | |
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wishlist!!! 12/16/2015 One hot summer day, a redneck came to town with his dog, tied it under the shade of a tree, and headed into the bar for a cold one. Twenty minutes later, a policeman entered the bar and aske 0 Comments, 128 Views, 0 Votes | |
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growing pain !!!! 12/11/2015 There is this guy who really takes care of his body. He lifts weights and jogs 5 miles a day. One morning he looks into the mirror and admires his body. He notices that he is really suntanned all over 0 Comments, 131 Views, 0 Votes | |
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what an ass!!! 12/6/2015 A married couple in their early sixties... were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary in a quiet and romantic restaurant. Suddenly, a tiny beautiful fairy appeared on their tabl 0 Comments, 131 Views, 0 Votes | |
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benny who? 12/6/2015 A guy named Benny is sitting in a bar mouthing off that he knows everybody. So his buddy bets $10 the next person to walk in the bar didn't know him. Somebody walks in the bar and says "Hey Benny what 0 Comments, 113 Views, 0 Votes | |
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oh shit!!! 12/3/2015 ********************************** Doc, " says Steve, "I want to be castrated." "What on earth for?" asks the doctor in amazement. "It's something I've been thinking about for a long time and 0 Comments, 91 Views, 0 Votes | |
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lets make a deal!! 12/1/2015 man went into a pharmacy and asked to talk to a male pharmacist. The woman he was talking to said that she was the pharmacist and that she and her sister owned the store, so there were no males employ 0 Comments, 100 Views, 0 Votes | |
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golfing 11/27/2015 Two lesbians were out playing golf. They tee off, one drive goes to the right, and one drive goes to the left. One of them finds her ball in a patch of buttercups. She grabs a club and takes 0 Comments, 150 Views, 0 Votes | |
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wtf??? 11/27/2015 A beautiful young woman about to undergo a minor operation is lying on a gurney in a hospital corridor awaiting the medical staff. A man in a white coat approaches her, lifts up the sheet, and visual 0 Comments, 123 Views, 0 Votes | |
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happy anniversary baby!!! 11/23/2015 A man asks his wife during a 25 marriage anniversary: - Darling, have you been unfaithful to me? - Yes, honey, three times. - When was the first time? - Do you remember the situation when you went to 0 Comments, 153 Views, 0 Votes | |
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poets!!!! 11/22/2015 it seems that two of the great Romantic British Poets, Shelly and Keats, died on the same day. When they got to heaven St. Peter said, "I'm sorry, but I only have room for one poet. I'll tell you what 0 Comments, 80 Views, 0 Votes | |
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growth! 11/19/2015 A woman is having a hard time getting her tomatoes to ripen so she goes to her neighbor with her problem. The neighbor says, "All you have to do is go out at midnight and dance around in the garden na 0 Comments, 95 Views, 0 Votes | |
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lets get it on!!! 11/17/2015 While standing in front of the gorilla's cage, a gust of wind swept some dust into his eye. As he rubbed his eyelid, the gorilla went crazy, bent open the bars, and beat the guy senseless. When the gu 0 Comments, 79 Views, 0 Votes | |
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yea puppies!!! 11/16/2015 A father and his 6-year-old are walking down the street, and they come across two dogs having sex. The boy is shocked by what he sees and asks his father "Daddy, what are they doing?" The father, not 0 Comments, 117 Views, 0 Votes | |
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pledge!!! 11/13/2015 A young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor told them, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks." The couple agreed and came b 0 Comments, 94 Views, 0 Votes | |
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one for the veterans!!! 11/11/2015 One Sunday morning, the priest noticed Little Johnny was staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. It was covered with names, and small American flags were mounted on either 0 Comments, 91 Views, 0 Votes | |
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shucks daylight saving time! 11/10/2015 A rather confident 007 walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, " 0 Comments, 78 Views, 0 Votes | |
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you did this! 11/8/2015 Johnny’s girlfriend was in labor with they first . She was shouting out, “Get this out of me? Give me the drugs.” She looked at him and said, “You did this to me you *******!” < 0 Comments, 61 Views, 0 Votes | |
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oh no!! 11/8/2015 A vacationing penguin is driving through Arizona when he notices that the oil-pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor. He drives to the nearest town and stops 0 Comments, 73 Views, 0 Votes | |
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good side effects! 11/6/2015 If I was a man and had an erection lasting longer than four hours at my age. I wouldn't call a doctor. I would call and >>! everybody I know! 0 Comments, 35 Views, 0 Votes | |
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cooks! 11/4/2015 A young woman, in the course of her college life, came to terms with her homosexuality and decided to come out of the closet. Her plan was to tell her mother first; so on her next home visit, 0 Comments, 107 Views, 0 Votes | |
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genius!!! 10/31/2015 A young Arkie goes off to college. Half way through the semester, having foolishly squandered all of his money on his girlfriend, he calls home. "Dad, " he says, "You won't believe what mode 0 Comments, 100 Views, 0 Votes | |
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giving the whole 9 yards! 10/28/2015 This expression is thought to be about machine gun belt lengths or some other silly nonsense....the truth be told. The average male penis is known to be 6 inches, The average woman requires 54 SLOW s 0 Comments, 42 Views, 0 Votes | |
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are you a lesbian too? 10/22/2015 A cowboy walks into a bar and sits down and orders a beer. A few minutes later a beautiful blond walks in and sits down next to him. She looks him over and says are you a real Cowboy ? To which he res 0 Comments, 119 Views, 0 Votes | |
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smart ass!!! 10/17/2015 My small grandson wandered off from me at a shopping mall. A uniformed security guard approached him and asked if he was lost? He told the guard he had lost his grand dad. The security guard asked 0 Comments, 50 Views, 0 Votes | |
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take note guys!!! 10/17/2015 FOR SALE BY OWNER Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes. Excellent condition, $200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.  0 Comments, 34 Views, 0 Votes | |
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George and the dragon!!! 10/11/2015 An 18th-century vagabond in England, exhausted and famished, came to a roadside Inn with a sign reading: "George and the Dragon." He knocked. The Innkeeper's wife stuck her head out a windo 0 Comments, 66 Views, 0 Votes | |
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lifes lesson 10/7/2015 A woman and her eight-year old were walking along a country road when they saw a stallion mounting a mare. "Mommy, " the little girl asked, "what are those horses doing?" The mother stuttered a mome 0 Comments, 136 Views, 0 Votes | |
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lets go fishing!! 10/7/2015 Four married guys go fishing. After an hour, the following conversation took place: First guy: "You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out fishing this weekend. I had to promise my wife 0 Comments, 126 Views, 0 Votes | |
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harder! harder! 10/4/2015 A young nun was assigned by the Mother Superior to help old Father O'Malley with his Sunday night bath. The next morning, the older nun asked the young girl if she had had any difficulties. "Oh no, " 0 Comments, 149 Views, 0 Votes | |
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spelling b!! 9/26/2015 A guy was driving down the highway with his smokin' hot blonde girlfriend and she said to him, 'I think those people in the car next to us are from another country. 'Why is that?' he said. 'Well, t 0 Comments, 71 Views, 0 Votes | |
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knowlegable staff!! 9/20/2015 A woman goes into Cabela's to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter. A Cabela's associate is st 0 Comments, 130 Views, 0 Votes | |
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wrestling!! 9/20/2015 A Russian and Ole the Norwegian wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic Gold Medal. Before the final match, the Norwegian wrestling coach came to Ole and said, "Now, don't forget all the rese 0 Comments, 91 Views, 0 Votes | |
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karma!!! 9/15/2015 I was on a clean up crew and we stopped to cut back the weeds and pickup trash. We got out of the truck and I reached in back to get a weed wacker. Some Pompous ass snatched it out of my hands ans tol 0 Comments, 116 Views, 0 Votes | |
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farts 9/12/2015 Martin had just met his girlfriend, when she asked him to go over to her place for dinner to meet her parents. Not wanting to make a bad impression, he goes over. After he has been sitting 0 Comments, 103 Views, 0 Votes | |
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long shot! 9/6/2015 jack takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he he 0 Comments, 95 Views, 0 Votes | |
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oh father! 9/6/2015 A distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerland asked the Priest beside her. ‘Father, may I ask a favor?’ ‘Of course. What may I do for you?’ ‘Well, I bought an expensi 0 Comments, 101 Views, 0 Votes | |
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heart attack!! 8/30/2015 A blonde gets home early from shopping and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. She rushes upstairs to find her husband naked on the bed, sweating and panting. "What's up?" she asks. "I'm ha 0 Comments, 140 Views, 0 Votes | |
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ma B!! 8/30/2015 A contestant on 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire?' had reached the final plateau. If she answered the next question correctly, she would win 1, 000, 000. If she answered incorrectly, she would pocket on 0 Comments, 106 Views, 0 Votes | |
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rights! 8/30/2015 The following took place at an international conference for women's rights. The first speaker, a lady from England stood and said, "During last year's conference, we spoke about being more a 0 Comments, 85 Views, 0 Votes | |
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so thoughtful! 8/23/2015 a man came home to be with his wife one rainy day and saw her lover running from the house, so he slapped his wife. crying she said, " that's the man that bought you that nice pair of shoes that you l 0 Comments, 99 Views, 0 Votes | |
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have to love mama! 8/19/2015 Maria had just got married and being a traditional Italian, she was still a virgin. So, on her wedding night, staying at her mother's house, she was nervous. But her mother reassured her. "Don't worry 0 Comments, 137 Views, 0 Votes | |
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fore!!! 8/15/2015 Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasp 0 Comments, 137 Views, 0 Votes | |
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burglar proof 8/12/2015 A burglar broke into a home and was looking around. He heard a soft voice say, "Jesus is watching you". Thinking it was just his imagination, he continued his search. Again the voice said "Jesus is 0 Comments, 105 Views, 0 Votes | |
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best cabbie ever! 8/11/2015 A devout Arab Muslim entered a taxi A devout Arab Muslim entered a taxi in Glasgow. He asked the driver to turn off the radio because as decreed by his religious teaching, he must n 0 Comments, 86 Views, 0 Votes | |
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good doggie!!! 8/9/2015 Chester and Earl are going hunting. Chester says to Earl, "I'll send my out to see if there are any ducks out in the pond. If there aren't any ducks out there, I'm not going hunting." So he sends the 0 Comments, 132 Views, 0 Votes | |
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oh cindy!! 8/3/2015 Cinderella was now 75 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now departed Prince, she happily sat in her rocking chair watching the world go by with her cat Alan. One afternoon, out of nowhere, a 0 Comments, 151 Views, 0 Votes | |
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i love football!!! 8/1/2015 AS A WOMAN PASSES HER 'S CLOSED BEDROOM DOOR, SHE HEARD A STRANGE BUZZING NOISE COMING FROM WITHIN. OPENING THE DOOR, SHE OBSERVED HER GIVING HERSELF A REAL WORKOUT WITH A VIBRATOR. SHOCKED, SHE 0 Comments, 156 Views, 0 Votes | |
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will you? 7/25/2015 An American guy decides to travel around. Europe. He walks into a bar and Jill (the Barmaid) takes his order, a beer, and notices his accent. Over the course of the night they get to know each other. 0 Comments, 176 Views, 0 Votes | |
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the challenge! 7/19/2015 A trucker working out of town stops into a tavern, walks up to the bar and orders a beer and a shot. After drinking it he orders another, while drinking that he notices a huge jar behind the bar stuff 0 Comments, 160 Views, 0 Votes | |
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please dont shoot! 7/12/2015 Diesel was bartending in a local pub and was getting ready to close for the night when a robber with a ski mask burst in and pulls a gun. He yells to Diesel, "This is a stick-up! Put all your cash in 0 Comments, 172 Views, 0 Votes | |
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mr. strange!! 7/11/2015 A lawyer named Strange was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it. "Here lies an honest man and a lawyer, " 0 Comments, 71 Views, 0 Votes | |
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mr. strange!! 7/11/2015 A lawyer named Strange was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it. "Here lies an honest man and a lawyer, " 0 Comments, 30 Views, 0 Votes | |
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docter visit!! 7/7/2015 its nice to see you again doctor!!!http://Swapfinder.com.com 0 Comments, 70 Views, 0 Votes | |
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testicles!! 7/4/2015 There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her 0 Comments, 117 Views, 0 Votes | |
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wife vs true love 6/28/2015 A husband went to the police station to file a "missing person" report for his missing wife: Husband : -I lost my wife, she went shopping hasn't come back yet. Inspector : -What is her height? Husband 0 Comments, 160 Views, 0 Votes | |
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keep the change 6/24/2015 A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there he takes off his clothes and starts to wander around. A gorgeous petite blonde walks by and the man immediately gets an erection. The 0 Comments, 179 Views, 0 Votes | |
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gym bodies!! 6/17/2015 its awesome to be working out at the gym with all those sexy hot body around you....eye candy for motivation...and the little extra you need to push yourself to the limit.. why is it that mos 0 Comments, 136 Views, 0 Votes | |
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gossipers!!! 6/15/2015 Mildred, the church gossiper and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business. Several members did not approve of her extra curricular activities, 0 Comments, 244 Views, 0 Votes | |
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my wife is deaf docter!!!! 6/15/2015 A man tells a doctor, "I think my wife's going deaf. What can I do?" The doctor says, "Well, try to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't 0 Comments, 165 Views, 0 Votes | |
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just imagine the look on her face!!! 6/10/2015 At the bank, I told the teller "I'd like to open a joint account please." She said, "OK, with whom?" I said, "Whoever has lots of money."  0 Comments, 74 Views, 0 Votes | |
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im a proud woman 6/8/2015 A woman misses a phone call. The woman hears she got a voice mail, and she plays her recent voice mail from her husband. The voice mail plays, “This may be my last phone call. I decided to call you. 0 Comments, 184 Views, 0 Votes | |
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my wish 6/8/2015 An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a cue ball. "I got to ask, sir, " says the bartender. "What happened?" The old gu 0 Comments, 121 Views, 0 Votes | |
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i'll show them that i am the boss 6/4/2015 The Board of Directors of a very large company felt it was time for a corporate shakeup and hired a new CEO. The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers. On a tour of the 0 Comments, 138 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Adam and Eve !!! 6/4/2015 One day the Lord called to Adam and said, "It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the earth so I want you to kiss her." Adam answered, "Yes Lord, but what is a 'kiss'?'" 0 Comments, 130 Views, 0 Votes | |
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what the heck? 6/4/2015 A wrinkled little old lady sold pretzels on a street corner in Chicago for a dollar a piece. Every day a young man would leave his office building at lunch time, and as he passed the pretzel stand, he 0 Comments, 116 Views, 0 Votes | |
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granpie knows bess 6/4/2015 An old Italian Mafia Don is dying and he called his grandson to his bed Grandson I wanta you to listen to me. I wanta you to take mya 45 automatic pistol, so you will always remember me. But grandpa I 0 Comments, 94 Views, 0 Votes | |
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men vs women!!! 5/27/2015 human body… It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support 6.6 pounds. The average man’s penis is two times the leng 0 Comments, 99 Views, 0 Votes | |
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smart 5/9/2015 Englishman, Scotsman and Irishman all die on Christmas Eve. They reach the gates of Heaven and St. Peter is waiting on them. " Hi guys" he says. "Now unfortunately you all died on Christmas Eve, so 0 Comments, 155 Views, 0 Votes | |
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those idiots!!!! 5/3/2015 a takes a shortcut home through the cemetery. Halfway across, he’s startled by a tapping noise coming from the misty shadows. Trembling with fear, he spots an old man with a hammer 0 Comments, 160 Views, 0 Votes | |
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mugged 4/25/2015 Late one night in the Washington D.C. a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money, " he demanded. 0 Comments, 98 Views, 0 Votes | |
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ask the darnest things!! 4/18/2015 A MOTHER AND HER YOUNG WERE FLYING FROM TAMPA TO TORONTO. THE LITTLE BOY HAD BEEN LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW. HE ASKED HIS MOTHER, IF BIG DOGS HAVE BABY DOGS, AND BIG CATS HAVE BABY CATS, WHY DON’T B 0 Comments, 254 Views, 0 Votes | |
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lol 4/9/2015 A man walks into a bar all distressed... He looks at the bartender and say please give me 5 shots of whiskey. The bartender noting something was wrong asks what the problem is. 0 Comments, 240 Views, 0 Votes | |
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one wish 4/4/2015 Bill Clinton was driving when he accidentally ran over a dog, crushing it flat as a fucking pancake. He climbed out of his Rolls and sat down on the grass totally distraught. Then Bill noticed a lamp 0 Comments, 151 Views, 0 Votes | |
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golfer 4/3/2015 A small private plane was flying over southwest Florida when all of a sudden the engine died, miles away from any airport. The pilot turned to his wife and said, “Don’t worry, Honey, the 0 Comments, 125 Views, 0 Votes | |
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congratulations!!!!! 4/3/2015 a man walks up to woman in the bar and buys her a drink Man- I'm Celebrating. Lady- Me too. Man- What A Coincidence. Why are you Celebrating? Lady- My Husband 0 Comments, 121 Views, 0 Votes | |
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dwl 4/3/2015 An old guy walks into a bar... And sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads: #1 CHEESE-BURGER: $1.50 #2 CHICKEN SANDWICH : $2.50 #3 HAND-JOB: $10.00 Checkin 0 Comments, 138 Views, 0 Votes | |
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mothers are too smart !!! 4/1/2015 John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how beautiful John's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between John and his roomm 0 Comments, 184 Views, 0 Votes | |
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blondes!!! 4/1/2015 A blonde walks into a used appliance store. The clerk approaches her and asks if she needs help. She then says "I'd like to buy that TV in the front window." The clerk says " I'm sorry, we don't sell 0 Comments, 137 Views, 0 Votes | |
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in laws !!! 3/21/2015 On the way back from a dinner celebrating their twentieth wedding anniversary, a couple is involved in a gruesome accident. The husband survives with only a broken arm, but the wife's face is horribly 0 Comments, 179 Views, 0 Votes | |
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use your head 2/15/2015 A blonde woman, a priest, a pilot, and a high schooler are all on a crashing plane. There are only enough parachutes to save three of them, and the pilot is the first to jump out. He grabs a parachute 0 Comments, 155 Views, 0 Votes | |
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1 life 2 live 2/15/2015 A blonde woman, a priest, a pilot, and a high schooler are all on a crashing plane. There are only enough parachutes to save three of them, and the pilot is the first to jump out. He grabs a parachute 0 Comments, 166 Views, 0 Votes | |
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left overs 2/13/2015 I walked into the kitchen tonight expecting my wife to be fixing dinner. Instead she was standing there wearing no clothes but wrapped in saran wrap. I turned around and walked back out. I don't like 0 Comments, 64 Views, 0 Votes | |
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it doesn't matter 2/3/2015 A truck driver spots a guy with long blond hair halfway down his back walking on the side of the highway, so he decides to pick him up. A mile into the ride the hitchhiker says, "I'll bet you thought 0 Comments, 55 Views, 0 Votes | |
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it doesn't matter 2/3/2015 A truck driver spots a guy with long blond hair halfway down his back walking on the side of the highway, so he decides to pick him up. A mile into the ride the hitchhiker says, "I'll bet you thought 0 Comments, 16 Views, 0 Votes | |
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wouldnt you? 1/25/2015 Larry and Bob, two friends, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Larry didn't show up. Bob didn't think much about it and figured mayb 0 Comments, 175 Views, 0 Votes | |
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good driver!! 1/17/2015 A police officer pulls over a driver and informs him that he has just won $5, 000 in a safety competition, all because he is wearing his seat belt. "What are you going to do with the prize m 0 Comments, 119 Views, 0 Votes | |
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yum yum 1/17/2015 Two cannibals, father and , were hunting one afternoon and they came across a beautiful young blonde sunbathing in the nude. They were both extremely stunned by her gorgeous body. The asked 0 Comments, 84 Views, 0 Votes | |
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lie detector!!!!!! 1/10/2015 So a man buys a lie detector robot that slaps you when you lie. He decides to try it out on his . Dad asks "What'd you do after school today, Johnny?" "I went to Billy's house and we did our homework 0 Comments, 129 Views, 0 Votes | |
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drunks 1/2/2015 last night, I staggered into a Catholic church and ended up in the confession booth. After a short while, the priest said: "What do you need my ?". I said, "is there any toilet paper on your side?". 0 Comments, 73 Views, 0 Votes | |
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drunks 1/2/2015 last night on the street who appeared to be looking for something. He said he was looking for his watch. He said he had fallen when it came off. I asked him where he fell. He said about a block away. 0 Comments, 43 Views, 0 Votes | |
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drunks 1/2/2015 last night on the street who appeared to be looking for something. He said he was looking for his watch. He said he had fallen when it came off. I asked him where he fell. He said about a block away. 0 Comments, 32 Views, 0 Votes | |
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grandpa's advice 1/1/2015 grandpa keeps telling me to marry a girl with small hands. I finally asked him, " Why small hands?" "Because it will make your dick look larger." 0 Comments, 73 Views, 0 Votes | |
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panties 12/25/2014 a lady lost three panties in her house and blames it on the maid in front of her husband. Maid said "Sir, you are my witness you know I never wear panties!" 0 Comments, 64 Views, 0 Votes | |
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true story 12/18/2014 a co worker of ours went to a bar(overseas trip) to meet with a female companion. she called and cancel after he had a few drinks. he was tipsy and decide to walk to the hotel a few blocks away. he wa 0 Comments, 190 Views, 0 Votes | |
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bar joke 12/18/2014 a man went to the bar with his wife. when he left for the counter to buy drinks a approached his wife and whispered, " You must Demand cash before sex, I know him he does not pay. 0 Comments, 112 Views, 0 Votes | |
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humour 10/31/2014 a man goes to church one Sunday and when he comes back from church he lift up his wife up and let her down after some time, the wife with all smiles and blushes and say to him "you really show that yo 0 Comments, 134 Views, 0 Votes | |
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adult theme! 2/11/2014 JOKE....Adult Themes XX (1) To make it straight, she pulls it.. To make it stand, she rubs it. To make it stiff, she licks it. To put it in, she pushes it. It's hel 0 Comments, 177 Views, 0 Votes | |
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laughsss 2/9/2014 The Why's of Men 1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX? (because they are plugged into a genius) ----------------------------------------------- 2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX? (they d 0 Comments, 90 Views, 0 Votes | |
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what a woman wants from her man!! 2/2/2014 a wants a man that owns a yacht, multiple mansions, multiple cars, private jet etc..... in her twenties...she want a man that owns a business, professional athlete, owns a mansion....etc 0 Comments, 121 Views, 0 Votes |
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